Douglass' Weekly Sex Tip

*whistle blows*

Penalty on the the play.  Failure to verbalize.  1 date suspension. 

*Douglass is pissed*

"Failure to verbalize.  This is a common mistake both men and women make on a consistent basis.  To put it in layman's terms, you don't let your partner know you are enjoying yourself through auditory responses while you are sexing.  I am confused by this phenomenon.  Ladies, if it feels good let him know by groaning or screaming, or by simpling saying 'That feels good'.  Fellas, don't just get in there and hammer away, talk to her.  Tell her that you are enjoying the experience as much as she it.  You do not have to hold a full conversation, but give her some indication that you aren't just there to lay pipe.  I am not saying that you have to be as ignorant as the folks from porn, but something is better than nothing."

"For the more advanced users, dirty talk can also spice things up between the sheets.  Be careful though, sometimes dirty talk can get a little too dirty, and that can get you in trouble.  For example, don't call your partner a 'FILTHY WHORE' if you have any indication that she may not like it.  Ladies, don't try to get your partner more into the experience by telling him that he 'HAS A DICK LIKE A G.I. JOE' if you are not absolutely sure that he will not go into the fetal position and start crying."

"So remember, talking is not reserved only for the good folks at West Coast Productions, or Bang Bros.  You and your partner can talk too. Just avoid conversations, and calling him/her by the wrong name."

"That could be disastrous."



Lina said...

Awww shit, Douglas gives sex tips. I like it. Ummm...I agree. I have been known to hold conversations though. Just a personal preference kinda thang.

Pocahontaz said...

Im feeling that...whats up you...its a been a minute...=)

Anyways, umm...so yeah, there is no such thing as too dirty. I however love the dialect in between making love...it makes it that much more interesting and intense. We should be the only one making noise though...i tell ya, if the tv or radio is on...for me, major distraction, Im subject to bust out singin a verse or two...even if it is something totally unrelated to love making..LOL

kid.a said...

yea you have to be careful not to point out things that your partner says or reveals to you when your having an intimate moment like this...i.e. sex fetishes.

I think there is a fine line that you have to walk b/c if you laugh or comment or react (negatively) on something your partner says or does (as long as it isn't harmful) i.e. fetishes, it will only make the situation worse...and your sex life will be less pleasing if not non-existent.

at least that is what Dr. Drew has said repeatedly on Loveline...

12kyle said...

Yoooooooooo!!!! I'm rollin!!!

"don't call your partner a 'FILTHY WHORE' if you have any indication that she may not like it."


One Man’s Opinion said...

I like the dirty talk. But I agree you have to be careful. For example...I always wanna say "take this dick, bitch." Especially if it's feeling hella good, but I have to hold it back because I don't want to offend. Seriously.

kayellejaye said...

Good stuff! Quiet sex is bad sex. If I'm quiet, more then likely I'm rolling my eyes and scrunching up my face too. I know...TMI.

Jaded said...

lol @ filthy whore! I'd be like "who you callin' a whore?!?!"